You are only as good as your followers.

Said noone.

But, if you go by the rules of Twitter, this definitely rings true.

I don't actively post on Twitter, but I read a lot there. And given that I don't generate interesting content, it is understandable that the follower quality, can best be described, on an optimistic day, as "Meh".

But, if the handles of my followers are anything to go by, I definitely lead a very interesting life.

For instance:

@WeddingPlz follows me. Like, "1 Photo Please". It is very hard to imagine what type of a person is asked to get married the same way that she is asked to get clicked for a photo. But hey, that's me. It doesn't matter, I guess, that I had a wedding last year. Every once in a while, you can request me. Always with a "Please".

Then there's @Ritu. Fairly simple. Nothing weird. Except her About Me that states quite clearly, "Share Market and insider news. 97% accurate advise. Add whatsapp +918758243262." That's right. Insider trading, with 97% accuracy. If Ritu had followed Rajat Gupta (of Mckinsey Insider trading scam), he would not exactly be in jail today, serving a two year term. But, Ritu is selective. She only follows pros like me, who are not likely to botch up insider trades.

This guy is pretty cool too - @RaajaBeta - "I used to follow my dreams, but then I got a restraining order." Ouch. Should I be worried?

But, the one that affected me the most is @YouDisappointUs. I wish I knew how I disappointed them. :(

Did I say something wrong? Did I not do enough? Is it the blog? Is it the boring career I chose? Is it my language? Is it me? Is it my personality? I don't know. But I wish they would tell me. This has been giving me sleepless nights. How did I disappoint them! :(

If you go by these handles, my life story is something like this:

I am a rich share market player. I have a dark side to me. I do insider trading and I do it with 97% accuracy. I appear in weird people's dreams and get them thrown in jails for that. Once in a while, when these weird people say "please", I marry them. But despite all this, I am a disappointment to many.

Now, I am depressed.

Have a fun weekend, yo!

Cheers

Preeks

Huge Disclaimer: After writing the post, I realized, @RaajaBeta is a very good friend. He is OK with the post. Said bad publicity is publicity too. Yay! :D

Comments

Letters to the Upparwalla!

(Wow! BlogAdda made my day! :) ) Prologue: I have been SO so SO so lazy, busy and blank, that I stopped writing posts altogether. But then, on reflection, I thought I owed this one to the unseen forces above. Hence, this post! LETTER #1 To The Gods Above, 1, "All Roads Lead to Heaven" Road, Heaven - 000000 15.06.2010 From Un Faithful Earthling Somewhere on Earth - Does the pin code matter? Sir/Ma'am, SUB: Complaint Regarding Services Rendered This is to bring to your kind attention, the highly unsatisfactory services being rendered to me, not at all in keeping with the Contract signed during my release to the Earth. Further, I wish to register a complaint regarding the following key issues: Interaction With Irritating People : According to Clause 4 of my Contract which you have also signed, it was mutually agreed by both parties, that during my peaceful stay on Earth, my interaction with irritating peo...

The Truant Family!

The low hanging trees were always in demand. As Raji rushed for the nearest one, with her little brother in her tow, she cast a quick glance at the tree to survey the bounty. It was laden with fresh guavas, alright! Pumped, she put her foot on the lowest branch and pulled herself up. Raji had barely put her foot on the next branch, when she felt a tug on her skirt. Feeling a nudge of irritation, she peered down at her four year old brother. "What is it, Appu?" "Where's my guava?" he demanded. "Will you at least wait while I climb up?" She resumed her climb up carefully, so as not to tear her skirt. The trick was to choose the right branches.She had barely moved up one level, when she felt a tug again. She looked around for the nearest ripe guava and hurled it before Appu could speak.She heard his chuckles of delight as he dug into large juicy bites. That settled, she ensconced in a comfortable branch, and began her feast of the large, ripe guavas. S...

The Battle of the Cities

"Aasmaan Se Tapka, Khajoor Ke Ped Pe Latka" How else would explain my wonderful vacation, moving from one hothouse called Delhi to another called Hyderabad? To be fair, I never thought I was going to a hill-station or Switzerland. But a cooler Hyderabad would have been so much more fun! Cities have their own ways of growing on you. Or of not growing, but clawing at you. Either way, you cannot ignore some cities. Hyderabad is one of them. 20 years, and our love-hate match continues. Day 1 is always the day of the bungle before the war. I emerge from the airport, all optimistic, with brushed up Telugu skills and renewed love for the hometown. Half an hour later, on the top of the long snake-like flyover, enroute to the city, the anger begins to kick in. Conversations with drivers. That's when I realize the war is on. I speak my posh, broken Telugu, and the drivers, their rude, unbroken Telugu. At some point, I try putting up a white flag and shift to Hindi politely. To n...

The Other Side of Life

Search This Blog