Day 21: O for Open, Honest Interviews

The strangest interview experience I ever had,
Was not good. In fact, it was quite bad.
The problem was my interviewer was a fluff detector.
Anything you said, he multiplied by the truth factor.

Tell me a little bit about yourself, he said.
I replied, I am an Evangelist and Innovation Head.
He smirked, you mean you are paid to make those presentations,
With huge stock photo images and single line notations?

I said, excuse me Sir, there's a lot more to my job.
He replied, maybe, but your title makes you sound like a snob.
It's ok, he said, tell me about a time you failed.
I took a deep breath and my rehearsed answer I exhaled.

"There was this once when I believed in my dream,
And invested money in a rocket scheme.
Sadly, it didn't go as well as I thought."
He replied, nice try pulling off an Elon Musk plot.

What is your greatest weakness, he bellowed.
Unfortunately, I am a workaholic, I crowed.
He smiled, I see what you did there. Think I'm a fool?
Masking a strength as a weakness. Not so cool.

Ok, tell me this, he said, what's your big goal?
I cleared my throat, this answer could bare my heart and soul.
"Dear sir, not all those who wander are lost,
I picked the road less traveled like Robert Frost."

He yawned, "let me know when the English class is done.
Your pretentious answers are no longer fun."
I lost my cool and finally blurted,
"I'm sorry sir, but you're making me feel disconcerted.

I am good at what I do. I wanted to impress you.
So I used some fluff. Maybe a bit of an overdo.
Take me or not, now I don't even care."
He replied, "I like this honesty, it's so rare.

Infact, I am so impressed, I offer you this job"
I launched into my rehearsed speech with a sob,
"I would like to thank God and my belief in..."
He shouted, ok, mistake, your offer's in the bin!