Drumrolls and All That

In crass Hindi, this moment would have been aptly defined as "Laut ke buddhu, ghar ko aaye". 

Exact translation would mount to "Fools return home" and that's what this post is.

So, after taking a break from work, doing a second Masters, getting a job in Singapore and moving countries, I am back on the blog. 

Who would have thunk?

An year back, I had no idea this is what I would be doing in an year. But then again, do we know what we will be doing an year from now? 

Lesson learnt. No planning, no guessing. 

Just keep exploring, keep doing new things, keep learning, keep meeting new people. Things will happen. Trust. Like a fool (who returned home!)

So, while I discover this part of my life, Singapore, I thought I need the blog more than the blog needs me. Because moving countries is not in the least as glamorous as it sounds. 

There's the whole deal with selling all belongings which you have hoarded lovingly over the years. Atleast 50 poeple will advise you to put up ads on Olx. And every single one of those 50 people will be wrong in assuming that it's easy to sell things on an app. It's not. It entails negotiations which would make the famed Sarojini Nagar bargains seem juvenile. 

Let me give you a real example.

My ad for my absolutely "beautiful, elegant, timber wood stylish triangular Dining Table from Urban Ladder. Barely used. 2 years old. Rs 30,000." received quite a few offers. And this is how they were:

Buyer: "5000. Ok?"

My reply: "Sir, I said Rs 30,000. How is it fair to ask for Rs 5000? It's from Urban Ladder. It is beautiful. It also has 6 chairs."

Buyer: K. Rs5100. Can pick up today. ok?

My reply: It is a piece of my heart you are bargaining for. How can it be so cheap?

Buyer: I get same on Amazon for 10K. 5100, ok or no?

My reply: Did Amazon fill the table with memories and warmth the way we did? Did Amazon host friends and families on the table like we did? Does the Amazon table giggle with the knowledge of the secrets of my kitchen? No sir. No. 

Buyer: 5K. Yes or no?

My reply: Take it and go. Never look at me ever again.

I lost count of the number of such bargains we gave in to. 

But the most classic story was that of our study table. We had a beautiful "walnut study table of mahogany finish". 

It got sold for Rs 6000. And I dearly loved that table. I spent hours together studying on it the last one year, finishing off assignment, while secretly watching Modern Family. 

After the deal was finalized and the pick up was scheduled for an hour later, I started cleaning the table. Meticulously cleaning every corner of it, so my table remembers me as the best owner it ever had. There was a black line on the white board and the husband was trying hard to scrap it off. The genius in me woke up and suggested using nailpolish remover.

30 minutes to pick up. And we poured nail polish remover on the white surface.

Woah. The mark is going! Yay!

Oh wait. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. What did we do? Why is the paint going off!

Yes, just like that, the paint on the table was getting wiped off, because nail-polish removers magically remove polish! Who would have thought?

Damage control!!

I fished out some old water color paints from my stationary.

15 minutes to go.

Husband and I were bent over the table, tongue sticking out, brush in hand, trying to paint white over the damaged portions. It was not drying up. Blow dryer. That's what we need.

Umm, no. The blow dryer started melting the paint and blowing it away from the damage!

3 minutes to go.

We hid all evidence of the mishap. And stood smiling, like nothing happened. I bid farewell to my table that way. Trying hard not to look at a splotch of white paint mixed with polish and Colin.

Before the table reached the new owner, we sent a message to him, "We are thankful that you bought this table. We have lovingly used this table and have many memories with it. Please look after it well."

Our plan worked. After that message, he would be a fool to blame us for the mishap. He replied, "Please don't worry. Your table is in good hands."

Chapter closed.

My sister, very accurately, reminded me of this when I told her about the incident:

Mr Bean's Painting Damage Control (Source: Imgur)

If you don't recognize this, it is a scene from the Mr Bean movie, when he accidentally sneezes on a million dollar painting and then comes up with this make-shift drawing to cover up for his mistake.

We are all Mr. Bean, deep inside.

Anyway, long story short. Moving ain't easy. We are not even done yet. Sherlock is yet to join me. Till then though, we have the blog to keep us going.

Have a good weekend!

Cheers

Preeks